Goals for 2013

2013 Here We Go........

-Pray for new opportunities and be willing to face the challenges. 

-Spend time with God everyday wether it be praying or reading the Bible.

-Tough Mudder in fall

-I really need to follow what God puts on my heart to do.  I spend to much time thinking what I should do, could do, or would do If.... There are no If's, this is my life. If it isn't in His plans or my heart to get married, date, or have kids why do I obsess about these things?

- Do Zumba classes even if I am afraid what the other trainers will think of me. 

-Take an acting class 

-Try one new vegetable dish a week.

-Pray for God to bring the right one in my life and stop communicating with and thinking about the obvious wrong ones. 

Guys and Phone Calls

I am so old that when I was in college I had a land line. It was my only form of communication. Of course, cell phones were very pervasive at that time, a mere 7 years ago. But, I didn't want to pay 40 dollars a month to talk to people that I saw every week.

At that time I also had my first crush. He was tall, the most outspoken man I had ever meant, and was acing science courses that I could only dream of passing. While I love my quiet time and usually keep my circle of friends relatively small, he seemed to have a million friends. Apparently, these friends needed a call often from his cell phone.

After months of anticipating any work shift with him or Innermission with the Navigators, a college ministry, something finally happened. I should have expected it after his awkward flirting and obvious staring. In our steps of trying to strengthen communication with each other he asks if I have a cell phone.... "No, I don't" I said not knowing what to say next. I couldn't say, "but, I have a land line... you can call that...." So, that was that. No cell phone = no easy communication.

Finally, over a year later I got the cell phone. Honestly, now, with friends and family all over Ohio and the country I can't imagine my life without it.

Years after I got the cell phone I only used it for calling purposes. While everyone was texting I did not. Paying 10 dollars a month seemed expensive to slowly type a message to someone when you could just dial and speak it much faster than spelling it out.

Over a year ago I started online dating. Emailing men from all over the country was fun at first, but then we needed to keep communication going. Talking over the phone seemed scary... but, texting, that seemed safe. The only reasonable thing to do was to drive to Cincinnati Bell and add it to my wireless plan. It only took a few days before texting became my favorite method of contact with friends, family, and guys.....

A few days ago I exchanged a few emails via facebook with a guy who just got back from Afghanistan. Excited he would get his iPhone turned back on, he suggested that we could use facebook chat. I had to inform him that I don't have the internet on my phone and then I suggested that we could be "old school" and just text. I haven't heard from him since.

Today I have a cell phone for talking and texting. Before I know it I will forge over the money to have the internet every waking hour. I don't have a man that can dial to a land line, call the ten digits to my cell phone, or text (maybe putting me in his directory requires work?). Wrong guy after wrong guy after wrong guy.....after.... wrong .... guy. But, I will learn the difference between the Android, Blackberry, and iPhone!

Bella Boo the cuddle bunny

We found you as a stray and invited you to stay.
You always over ate and never smelled that great.
More than likely by my side, you weren't one to hide.
Your nemesis was Kenzie the cat and on our lap you sat.

You were here less than a year and today there are many tears.
The health problems were rare, expensive to treat, and more than we could handle.
I always smiled when you continually rubbed your head against my sandle
After a diagnoses and realizing the severity we know pain must have been with you for awhile
Today you left your ailing body and maybe you are above with a smile
Chasing toy mouses and lots of strings
Cats like you should get little wings
Until your dying day an ear rub and cuddling was what you lived for
Nothing but sweetness and sugar was your core

Eternity Seems Like For- Ever....

"Money makes promises that only God can fulfill." -Chuck Mingo at Crossroads Church

"People who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge men into ruin and destruction. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs." -1 Tim. 6:9-10

In this verse The Message version of the Bible has "the lust of money" instead of "the love of money." One may ask why would any version write "the love of money"? Well, the language the Bible was originally written was greek and there are three different meanings for what the English language calls "love." When "the love of God" was written in greek, more than likely "the love of money" was used with a different "love."

I appreciate this verse from the message because I have come to understand the radical difference between love and lust in the past few years. "Lust" is about what someone gets today, it is a thrilling instant self-gratification. It takes no work, no commitment, and no change from puberty, otherwise known as "childish ways" (1 Cor. 13:11).

Love values our souls for eternity. "Love is patient, Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, It is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." -1 Cor. 13: 4-7 It takes commitment, forgiveness, and a relationship with God.

After comparing money with lust I thought of this "Lust makes promises that only love can fulfill." We shouldn't let the thrill of lust or the security of money be our drive. These two things are of "the world" and can kill our eternal soul. Jesus asked, "What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?" -Matt. 8: 36. One day, we will both die (maybe not the same day...). But, it is guaranteed just as much as the day we were born was.

I would like God to be my number one relationship, influence, and hope while I spend time on this earth. Eternity will be spent with Him as my Father. Therefore, I should start relying on Him ASAP. It will take commitment, patience, trust, and change in myself. But, isn't that what love is? Love and God are for our eternal souls. Lust and Money are only for today.

I am just beginning to think that I can never give God enough. I only hope that the remainder of my days in this world are further testimony of what He has to offer.

Ten Goals for 2012

I have spent a lot of time thinking about my goals for this year. I am sure I will have to modify some, abandon one or two, and set a few more because, "Plans change."

1. Spend every day with God. He has really laid it on my heart to do this in order to grow closer to Him. No matter how busy I get to always set aside at least half an hour for Him daily. I have been using Oswald Chamber's devotional book daily and then reading exerts from the Bible.
2. Run away from the mind set of trying to date. I spent half of last year wanting to punch someone because every guy I dated or "talked to" left me agitated or with a broken heart.
God has told me about 30 million times to leave this way of living very quickly. I am finally obeying this year!
3. Work as a Personal Trainer. I already got hired by LA Fitness and am waiting to start. Today I will shadow another trainer for about two hours. Unsure of what to expect and if I will be any good at it, I am really nervous!!!
4. The Flying Pig is May 6, 2012. I want to set a PR (personal record) of 2:15:00 for the half marathon. This is a pace of 10:18 for 13.1 miles. Speedwork and tempo runs have been added to my training this year. Hopefully this will help!!
5. Establish a saving plan to eventually buy a condo. I aspire to live in something better than apartment in the near future and I don't want to take care of a house. A condo seems to be a good choice.
6. I need to count how many grams of sugar I eat each day. I put on a little carb weight the second half of 2011 because I got lazy in focusing and saying "no" to what I was putting in my mouth. I worked at an ice cream shop for the summer and this appeared to be a huge factor. Also, I have a size 2 bridesmaid dress I have to fit into June 9.
7. Drive down to Atlanta at least once. There are several people that I miss down there and I can't let another year go by without visiting them.
8. Get to bed by 11 p.m. on every night that I can control it. Good sleep affects how you work, play, work out, eat... I need sleep!!
9. Get started earning CEC's to maintain certification for my personal trainer cert. through ACSM.
10. Last, but not least and more than likely the hardest goal to tackle....Set boundaries for time on facebook. To only spend half an hour every morning would probably be a sufficient goal. It is very convenient to communicate with people, however it is more of a "time waster" than anything. This spring when I am training for the half marathon, being the early months of establishing myself as a personal trainer, and working part time at the dairy bar I will probably not get on it all together.

Key Dates:
April 14-21 - Florida with mom, Amy, Terry, and family
May 6 - Flying Pig Half-Marathon
June 9 or 16 Mobile, Alabama - Ana's wedding
?????? - Trip to Atlanta

2 weeks down - 50 to go:)

I am not wishing my life away. At least, most of the time I am not. Every day should be enjoyed to it's fullest - even the bad ones. Those days provide a lot of lessons, a lot of leaning on God, and potentially give interesting stories for the future. In order to enjoy each day I am finding that it takes a lot of trust in God. Otherwise all I do is follow a list of chores to be done - "I will feel better if I can just control something." Or I worry about tomorrow ... and that is the worst. Why worry? As Brian Tome said, "we came into this world butt naked!" We all have heard, "You can't take it with you." 28 years ago from this very date of Fri. Jan. 13 I was an embryo. I was a little chunk of cells. Now I sit with my legs crossed, my fingers type to form coherent sentences, and my heart pumps blood to every cm. in my body. God is in charge!! I must enjoy each day as it comes. I need to use the resources God has given me, whether it be energy, time, money, relationships, for His benefit.

Now, how can every minute, every dollar, every encounter with another human be used for His benefit? I don't know. Those details take a lot of communication with Him to find out. But, no worries, Faithfulness to Him is really what He wants - Not Success. Running is very symbolic for me and I will use it to exemplify my train of thought. After stretching yesterday I got on the treadmill and instantly sped it up to run 10 min. miles. This is REALLY fast for me. The first two miles I was out of breath, I was not enjoying myself, my mind and legs felt completely uncomfortable with this pace. After the first two miles though I adapted a bit and I almost... liked that pace. The only reason I even attempted to run 4 miles and shave off 4 minutes from my usual 5.5 mph pace is because I am following a plan given to me from a runner's store in hopes of setting a PR on May 6, 2012. The schedule is making me run with speed, up hills, miles on top of miles that I would not do based on my feelings or even, my logic. (My logic would tell me 'if you want to cover 13.1 miles get in your car and drive it. Getting skinny = run 1 mile + eating very little.) Instead, I am following a schedule given to me by someone who I consider an elite runner. He is in his 50's, has run several marathons, and doesn't let the weather stop him. (The weather has stopped me from walking to my car :() However, this training is teaching me perseverance, that I should NEVER give up, and every stride is vital to get to the finish line. Most importantly, I love that I am able to do something that I didn't deem possible 4, 5, 6 years ago...covering 13.1 miles with nothing but my own two legs, O2 in my lungs, a pumping hear, and many prayers to God.

What if I told God, using all of my heart, that I wanted to follow his schedule for the next 50 weeks? Where would I be on Jan. 1, 2013?

The older I get the more I realize that if God doesn't tell me to do it I shouldn't do it. If I don't give something because of Him I shouldn't give it.